In this Author POV feature, we introduce My Pain Is My Identity by Lawyer Johnson, a profound and deeply personal memoir that confronts the lifelong impact of childhood trauma, the silence that often surrounds it, and the resilience required to rebuild a life shaped by hardship. Johnson begins his story at seven years old, the moment his childhood was stolen from him, and traces how that early wound followed him through the streets of Brooklyn, through prison, and into adulthood. For decades, he carried his pain in silence, believing that speaking it aloud would make him weak. Instead, he discovered that breaking that silence was the first step toward healing.
This memoir provides a rare and essential perspective on male childhood trauma, incarceration, faith, identity, and the quiet ways pain can shape a life when left unaddressed. Johnson writes with emotional honesty about the journey from shame to self-understanding, and the spiritual and personal work required to transform suffering into purpose. For librarians seeking powerful, community-centered narratives that speak to trauma recovery, reentry, emotional resilience, and the importance of vulnerability, My Pain Is My Identity offers both a compelling story and a meaningful resource.
Can you introduce your book for librarians who may be discovering it for the first time?
My Pain Is My Identity is the story I spent most of my life too afraid to tell. It’s a deeply personal memoir that begins with the moment my childhood was taken from me at seven years old, a moment that shaped my identity long before I knew what identity even meant. I carried that pain silently for decades, through the streets of Brooklyn, through prison, and into adulthood, trying to outrun something that had already shaped the core of who I was. This book opens a window into an experience many men share but almost never talk about. By telling my truth, I wanted to show that even the most painful beginnings can lead to healing, purpose, and a life rebuilt through faith and resilience. This isn’t just a story of what happened to me, it’s a story of what I chose to become in spite of it.
What inspired you to write this book, and what core themes do you hope readers take away from it?
I wrote this book because silence almost destroyed me. I spent years pretending I was fine, years burying the trauma that shaped every decision I made. Carrying that kind of pain without speaking it is its own kind of imprisonment. After deep emotional work, spiritual growth, and a lot of time alone with God, I realized He kept bringing me back to the same truth: someone needed my story to survive their own. That realization is what finally pushed me to write.
Through this book, I want readers to understand how childhood abuse follows a person into adulthood, not because they want it to, but because trauma becomes woven into identity when it’s never addressed. I hope readers see how resilience grows when you confront your wounds rather than hide from them. Themes of faith, healing, transformation after incarceration, and redefining what it means for a man to be vulnerable are at the heart of this memoir. More than anything, I want readers to know that healing is possible, that their story matters, and that what happened to them does not get the final say in who they become.
What kind of readers or patrons do you see this book resonating with most? (age range, grade levels, reading interests)?
This book speaks most powerfully to adults who have lived through childhood trauma but never felt safe enough to put words to it. I believe it will deeply resonate with men who have held their pain in silence, especially those who were taught that speaking about trauma somehow makes them weak. It will also connect with survivors who are just beginning their healing journey and need to know they’re not alone.
Beyond survivors, this memoir offers valuable insight for college students studying psychology, social work, counseling, or criminal justice. It helps them see the real human story behind the labels society places on people who end up in the system. Faith-based communities, recovery groups, mentors, educators, and advocates who work with at-risk youth or formerly incarcerated individuals will also find the story meaningful, because it speaks to the importance of compassion, understanding, and the power of a second chance.
What themes or discussion topics do you hope librarians highlight when recommending the book?
I hope librarians highlight that this is, first and foremost, a story about the unspoken reality of male childhood trauma, a topic seldom acknowledged but widely experienced. I want readers to see how healing becomes possible when we stop hiding from our pain and finally give ourselves permission to speak. The book explores how trauma shapes identity, relationships, and life choices, and how unaddressed wounds often push young men, especially young men of color, into cycles of survival that lead to incarceration.
I also hope librarians spotlight the themes of faith, emotional honesty, and generational healing. Within Black and Brown communities especially, silence around childhood trauma runs deep. My story challenges that silence and shows how vulnerability is not weakness, but the very thing that helps us reclaim our lives.
Are there any sensitive topics or content considerations librarians should be aware of?
Yes, the book directly addresses childhood abuse, emotional distress, shame, and the long journey of psychological recovery. I speak honestly about my experiences in prison and the mindset required to survive in that environment. The memoir also touches on abandonment, addiction, and the destructive patterns that childhood trauma can create in adulthood. My tone is raw and truthful, because that’s the only way I know how to honor what I lived through. While the book is written with care, empathy, and purpose, certain passages may be triggering for readers who share similar histories.
If your book were part of a library display, what topics, themes, or comparable titles would you pair it with?
If displayed in a library, this book fits naturally into conversations around trauma, healing, and the courage it takes to speak truth after years of silence. It would pair well with themes of redemption, second chances, and the emotional journey of men navigating identity and mental health. Readers who connected with A Child Called “It”, The Body Keeps the Score, Man’s Search for Meaning, Just Mercy, or Know My Name will find a similar depth of honesty and emotional resonance here. It also belongs in displays focused on overcoming adversity, surviving childhood abuse, and rebuilding life after incarceration.
Are there companion resources librarians or educators should know about?
Yes. I am releasing a companion guidebook titled Healing Through the Hurt: A Companion Guide to My Pain Is My Identity, which expands the emotional and spiritual work introduced in the memoir. This resource includes guided reflections, healing exercises, journaling prompts, and tools designed to help individuals and groups navigate their own journeys with trauma. It’s ideal for libraries, schools, youth centers, counseling programs, recovery groups, and ministries, anywhere people are looking for structured, supportive ways to talk about trauma and healing. This guidebook creates a safe space for conversation, growth, and community learning.
Which formats are currently available? (Hardcover, paperback, ebook, audiobook, bilingual editions, large print, classroom sets, ISBNs, and whether bulk discounts or school pricing options exist.)
To make the story accessible to as many readers as possible, the memoir is available in multiple formats. Readers can find it in paperback and hardcover through Amazon and IngramSpark, as well as digitally on Kindle, Google Play Books, and Apple Books. The audiobook, which brings the story to life in a deeply personal way, is available on all major audio platforms. The ISBNs are: Paperback 9798992807905, Hardcover 9798992807912, eBook 9798992807936, and Audiobook 9798992807929. Libraries, schools, correctional institutions, and community organizations can request bulk pricing to broaden access for the people they serve.
How could this book be used in community events or themed programming throughout the year? (For example: Earth Day, Black History Month, Pride, Hispanic Heritage Month, etc.)
This memoir can support a wide range of community programs throughout the year. During Child Abuse Prevention Month, it offers an honest perspective that can open the door for healing-centered conversations. For Mental Health Awareness Month, it sparks important dialogue about trauma, emotional wellness, and the stigma surrounding men’s mental health. During Black History Month, it contributes to discussions about Black men’s experiences with trauma, incarceration, faith, and identity. Men’s Health Month provides a platform to explore masculinity, vulnerability, and the importance of emotional support. For National Recovery Month, the book aligns with themes of transformation, reentry, and rebuilding life after trauma and incarceration.
Additionally, this memoir is well-suited for prison reentry programs, youth mentorship events, fatherhood initiatives, faith-based discussions, library-led community reads, trauma summits, and college coursework focused on social issues. Wherever people are gathered to talk about healing, identity, or second chances, this book has a place.
To learn more about Lawyer Johnson and his work visit his website here.
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