Piranha DD

Opening with a recap of Piranha 3D, this tacky horror-comedy sequel stars Danielle Panabaker as Maddy, a marine biology grad student who plans to spend the summer working near Merkin, AZ, with her sleazy stepfather, Chet (David Koechner), running the family water park, which—following the death of Maddy's mother—has been redesigned as The Big Wet, a mature-themed attraction. Staffed by buxom lifeguards, there's even an adults only pool full of naked women. For the grand opening, Baywatch star David Hasselhoff (satirizing himself) is coming to sign autographs and pose for photographs. But complications arise when deadly, super-sized piranha appear in nearby Cross Lake. So Maddy, along with her hunky ex-boyfriend (Chris Zylka) and nerdy co-worker (Matt Bush), consult eccentric scientist Carl Goodman (Christopher Lloyd), who theorizes that the killer fish are migrating through a network of underwater lakes and rivers. When Maddy discovers that Chet has been avoiding paying utility fees for the water park by illegally tapping into a nearby subterranean aquifer, she begs him to cancel the gala. Naturally, Chet refuses, so it's only a matter of time before the predictable, carnivorous catastrophe arrives with plenty of gory biting, bleeding, and jiggling bare breasts. A ridiculous, redundant, and pointless remake, this is not recommended. [Note: DVD/Blu-ray extras include audio commentary by director John Gulager, producer Joel Soisson, and co-writer Marcus Dunstan, “The Story Behind the DD” production featurette (8 min.), “A Lesson with John McEnroe” short featuring the tennis player (4 min.), deleted scenes (3 min.), the cast featurettes “The Hofftastic World of David Hasselhoff” (2 min.), “Busey's Bloopers” with Gary Busey (2 min.), and “Wet and Wild with David Koechner” (2 min.), and trailers. Exclusive to the Blu-ray release are bonus DVD and digital copies of the film. Bottom line: a solid extras package for a lame sequel.] (S. Granger)