The Veggie Tales animated adaptations of Old Testament stories are usually watered down for young audiences, but that's not the case with The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, which doesn't seem to be derived from a specific biblical tale. Instead, the values-based script by Phil Vischer features more universal, even secular, appeal as it serves up a picaresque, 17th-century adventure that kicks into high gear when a pirate named Robert the Terrible (voiced by Cam Clarke) kidnaps the son and daughter of his royal rival, the King (also Clarke). A flashing, round mechanism that looks like something out of Star Wars escapes the melee and waits until our present day to enlist a trio of nobodies—Elliot (Mike Nawrocki, also the director), George and Sedgewick (both Vischer)—to travel back in time and save the day. The wrinkle is that these three “heroes” are really pirate-themed dinner theater waiters struggling with personal issues (low self-esteem, timidity, laziness), who welcome the chance to redeem themselves even if the road ahead is full of danger. The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything ultimately offers an inspirational message about accepting life's challenges: the fact that it's delivered—with a fair amount of flair and wit—by a cucumber, a grape, and a gourd makes this very likely to find favor with young audiences. Recommended. [Note: DVD extras include audio commentary (by director Mike Nawrocki, writer Phil Vischer, and producer Paula Marcus), four “How to Draw” character segments (38 min. total), selected “Character Commentary” (13 min.), a 10-minute “Making a Veggie Pirate Movie” featurette, six minutes of “What Makes a Hero?” interviews with police officers and teachers, a five-minute “Why We Do It” behind-the-scenes featurette, a four-minute “Deja Grape” extended ending, an “Out to Sea” boat featurette (4 min.), a four-minute “Family Treasure Adventure” activity, a three-minute “Pirate 101 with Willory” segment on pirate vocabulary, a pirate singalong, three games (“Treasure Detector,” “Fashion Plank,” and pirates trivia), an interactive storybook, a discussion guide, an art gallery, and DVD-ROM features including wallpapers and coloring pages. Bottom line: an excellent extras package for a fun family film.] (T. Keogh)
The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything
Universal, 86 min., G, DVD: $29.98, Oct. 14 Volume 23, Issue 5
The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything
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