Notre Dame, Cathedral of Amiens--Part 1: Reflections--Live Walk-Through

I'll meet you at the end of this sentence, one of only a dozen or so uttered during the entire 14 minutes of this video: "The anagogical upward lifting sequence reveals the transformed classical order, a myriad of colonnades extended to infinity." Was it bad for you too? Purportedly a "live walk-through" of the Notre Dame cathedral in Amiens, this is--hands down--the most stupendously dull program I've seen in years. Combining elaborately pedantic sentences--such as the above (though, to be fair, there are some short, stupid ones as well: "Entry through Christ the door brings transformation")--with rather randomly arranged video camera shots of the 13th-centuryGothic cathedral, this opening volume in a trilogy (thrice the pain!) was created by the Media Center for Art History at Columbia University, and partially funded by the National Endowment for the Humanities (give me Mapplethorpe's dirty pictures, please!). I doubt that the producers could have made a less enticing portrait if they tried; still, the one true benefit I gained from watching this was that I was able to warn both of our teenagers that Columbia University's art program appeared to me to be a solid pass. There are two other titles in the series, but only sadistic architecture instructors intent on inducing REM sleep in their students will want to consider this; for all others, this series is not recommended. Aud: C. (R. Pitman)