Honey

Somehow the people at Universal Pictures got it into their heads that easy-on-the-eyes, thin-on-talent Jessica Alba (star of Fox's short-lived Dark Angel) should be a movie star. After which they apparently recruited a room full of monkeys to write this laughable follow-your-dreams disaster in which the actress plays a sprightly, adorably indomitable, J. Lo-inspired babe from the Bronx who becomes a music video dance choreographer without much effort, turns down a director's demand for sex, gets blacklisted, and then realizes what's really important in life: opening a neighborhood dance studio to help street kids avoid the thug life. A trite and graceless string of episodic clichés ("Oh, sweetie," gripes her mother, "I don't know why you can't just teach a class at a nice ballet school uptown."), Honey is not only plagued with a predictable, Cliff Notes level storyline, but even the dance scenes feel D.O.A. Not recommended. [Note: Available in both widescreen and full screen versions, DVD extras include “The Inside Scoop” audio commentary by director Bille Woodruff and star Jessica Alba, an 11-minute “Behind the Groove” making-of featurette, 33 minutes of deleted scenes (including an original opening), four minutes of outtakes, a nine-minute “Make Your Move: Dance Like Honey!” how-to dance segment hosted by Honey choreographer Laurie Ann Gibson, the music videos “J-A-D-A” by Jadakiss and Sheen and “Sexy” by Shawn Desman, the six-minute behind-the-scenes music video making-of featurette “In the Mix with Blaque” (and its finished product “I'm Good” by Blaque), as well as cast and filmmaker bios and film highlights, trailers, and DVD-ROM features. Bottom line: an impressive extras package for a disappointing film.] (R. Blackwelder)