I Sell the Dead

A chintzy attempt to recapture the gleeful goofiness of drive-in second features, director-writer Glenn McQuaid's lurid potboiler is an episodic tale of a pair of 19th-century grave robbers—crusty Willie Grimes (Larry Fessenden) and impish Arthur Blake (Dominic Monaghan)—who find there's more of a market for “undead” corpses than for the ordinary deceased. Told in flashback as Arthur, awaiting execution, is interviewed by an avuncular priest (Ron Perlman), the story unfolds of how the ghoulish duo used the first buried zombie they found to rid themselves of their cheapskate employer, a doctor who hired them to provide bodies for dissection. But then the movie spins off in all directions, becoming more of a series of sketches than a coherent narrative—one sequence, for example, has Willie and Arthur discovering the body of an alien (although nothing comes of it). The final act brings in beautiful female apprentice Maisey (Eileen Colgan), who persuades the pliable Arthur to put into motion a plan to invade the island redoubt of a powerful family of grave robbers in order to take over their business—a misadventure with dire consequences. Despite some funny moments, I Sell the Dead isn't nearly as outrageous and edgy at it clearly wants to be, so unless you're nostalgic for the kinds of sub-B pictures that schlockmasters like Roger Corman used to churn out, this is one to skip. Not recommended. [Note: DVD/Blu-ray extras include two audio commentaries (the first with costars Dominic Monaghan and Larry Fessenden; the second with director Glenn McQuaid), a “making-of” documentary (64 min.), a visual effects featurette (13 min.), a bonus comic book insert, and trailers. Bottom line: a solid extras package for an uneven horror spoof.] (F. Swietek)