The First $20 Million

Years from now, up-and-coming stars Rosario Dawson (Men in Black II) and Adam Garcia (Coyote Ugly) may look back on The First $20 Million and laugh at this misstep. When they do, they'll become the first people to derive any mirth from this leaden satire of the dot com collapse. Based on Po Bronson's novel, the film stars Garcia as Andy, a marketing whiz kid who quits his high-paying job to create something with his hands. He joins a socially awkward Indian hacker (Anjul Nigam), a morbidly obese engineer (Ethan Suplee), and a germ-phobia computer geek with anger issues (Jake Busey) to create a $99 personal computer, much to the chagrin of Big Business. Dawson, along for the ride as Andy's sexy neighbor and love interest, is stuck doing a striptease to “Midnight at the Oasis.” Beyond the sight gag of this ragtag team of workers trying to fit into a Porsche convertible, director Mick Jackson (L.A. Story, The Bodyguard) can't think of any way to produce visual humor besides the trite device of having the cast walk towards the camera in slow motion, Reservoir Dogs style. And despite a script by Jon Favreau (Swingers), there isn't a single smart or funny line of dialogue. Both inept and instantly dated, this is not recommended. (D. Fienberg)